Playing The “What If? Game
Published on 16 Jul 2008 at 6:34 am.
11 Comments.
Filed under Courage Series, Feature Articles, Personal Development Strategies, Spirituality & Inspiration.
Fear can have a powerfull negative impact on our lives especially when it spirals into dread that grows from anticipated unknown or troubling possibilities. Our imaginations can run wild with vivid details that can chain us to a life that is unwanted an unhappy. The fact is no one can scare us better than we can. Most “what ifs” focus on worse case scenarios…”What if I lose my job?” or “What if I can’t pay my bills?” or “What if someone gets angry at me?”
Years ago I was having coffee with a colleague and the topic of fear came up. He asked me about one of my fears and I answered, “I have a fear of losing everything and being out on the street living as a homeless woman or a bag lady.” He challenged me to heighten that fear and suggested the following scenario:
Imagine that I found myself in a town where I knew no one, had no money, no clothes except the ones I was wearing, no family, and no friends. As if I was just dropped there and had nothing except myself. He asked, “What would you do?” I could feel the panic beginning to escalate and I didn’t want to play. After my initial shock, my answers began to pour out. I said, “The first thing I’d do is look for work. I would accept any kind of job I could get to earn immediate cash. Then I would look for some place to sleep, any shelter that felt safe.”
The more I talked about what I would do, the calmer I felt. This “what if” scenario reminded me that I’m a survivor and willing to do whatever it takes to land on my feet. I always have and reminding myself of my abilities, tenacity, and courage was comforting. Whew!
In the same situation, what would you do?
Playing the “What if?” game can help to expose the truth about your fears so that you can claim responsibility for what you will do if the worst happens. You can realize that these horrific situations are more manageable than you imagined.
Our negative fears view life through a narrow lens and eliminate creative options and solutions. This game can help to expand your viewpoint and invite you to see things from a fresher perspective.
Here’s how to play:
Make a list of the specific fears that occupy your thoughts and might keep you up at night. After each “what if?” write down what you would do if your worse fears actually came true. Describe in detail what would happen and what you could do about it. Consider your options, resources, support, people….
After you’ve done that exercise, consider the opposite position
Make a list of all the best scenarios you can imagine. In other words, “what if everything you ever desired, dreamed about, yearned for…. happened.”
- What would you do?
- Would you be able to receive all this good with open arms?
- Who would you become?
I recommend journaling your feelings and observations. Reflect on what you learned about yourself that can become your growing edge. Purchase my Fear audio program, Transform Your Fear into POWER.
Have a great day
Lorraine
www.powerfull-living.biz
Yvonne on 16 Jul 2008 at 8:50 am: 1
Awesome blog and I love your suggestions. Doing the exercise provides with a way to connect with our inner truth and resources…empowering us into greater expansion.
With appreciation,
Yvonne
lorraine on 16 Jul 2008 at 8:53 am: 2
Thanks Yvonne!
My experience as been that when we face our stories of “what if” we find that the reality of what we imagine begins to dissipate and clarity shines through. Often, what a relief!
Blessings,
Lorraine
Gina Rafkind on 16 Jul 2008 at 7:33 pm: 3
Hi Lorraine,
I’m going to play this game-sounds like exactly what I need right now.
Great post-thanks so much,
Gina
lorraine on 16 Jul 2008 at 7:39 pm: 4
Go for it Gina
Let me know how it goes.
Warmly,
Lorraine
Lola Fayemi / Nourishment for your spiritual awakening on 17 Jul 2008 at 12:09 pm: 5
Hi Lorraine
Love it - face your fears head on instead of them holding you hostage and in this place of limbo.
Thanks for the exercise another great one for going into the fear.
In love, light and abundance x x x
Ricardo Bueno on 17 Jul 2008 at 3:14 pm: 6
What most people fail to realize in letting their fears and “what if” scenarios take over is that we ultimately have a choice: 1.) we can let our fears manifest themselves into reality, or 2.) we can choose to decide for ourselves what our future will be.
The key here is that “we do have a choice.”
lorraine on 17 Jul 2008 at 6:17 pm: 7
Making the point of “having a choice” is so important Ricardo
That’s one distinction that separates folks from identifying themselves as victims or champions.
Thanks for adding your voice to the conversation!
Warmly,
Lorraine
lorraine on 17 Jul 2008 at 6:20 pm: 8
Hi Lola
Your post on going into the darkness was great and what synchronicity with my post! I vote for freedom to be who I am rather than feeling captured and trapped by my emotions that are self-created illusions.
Be who you are Lola!
Namaste
Lorraine
Jeanne May on 20 Jul 2008 at 4:18 am: 9
Hi Lorraine…
Whenever I venture into uncharted waters for me… I do tend to play the what if game “worst-case scenario” stuff… but along with that nowadays is “what if my venture really takes off” scenario… for me it’s important to look both at worst-case and best case scenarios.
And as Ricardo says… we do have a choice.
Warmly
Jeanne
lorraine on 20 Jul 2008 at 7:55 am: 10
Hi Jeanne
Looking at the pros and cons is part of the decision-making process. My point is that when we allow our fear-driven “what’s ifs” to hold us back from living the life we want, this game can be a powerfull tool to free folks to enjoy their lives.
Cheers,
Lorraine
Powerfull Living » Do You Have The Courage to Say YES? on 3 Aug 2008 at 2:03 pm: 11
[...] few days ago I wrote a post called, Playing the “what if?” game which is a game we can play when dealing with fear about change. I can understand why the inner [...]