Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness
Published on 26 Nov 2007 at 11:55 am.
49 Comments.
Filed under Attraction, Business Development, Feature Articles, Personal Development Strategies, Spirituality & Inspiration.
Last week I did a presentation to a room full of women business owners, entrepreneurs, and leaders. The topic was “Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness”.
I looked forward to talking about the topic because so often I hear people complain about not having enough money, struggling with procrastination and overwhelm, feeling stuck or unhappy with themselves, their work, their life……
My client came in this morning angry and in a funk. She was angry with herself because she was dragging her feet on doing some things that would create financial ease in her life. Instead she was feeling desperate about paying her bills and was beating herself up for creating her situation. She has tons of tools to help her shift her attitude, feel more upbeat and positively energized. What was she doing about how she felt or the strain on her finances? Nothing. She was putting all of her attention on feeling bad and powerless.
Exactly my point of last week’s presentation.
What we do is engage in self-sabotage
- Mind games – risk aversion, avoidance (excuses, rationalizations, justifications) that might sound like, “I know what I’m supposed to do but I just don’t do it” I can’t afford it. I don’t have the time. Now is not the right time, I’m not ready”.
- Dramas/stories – The conversations we have inside our heads (worse case scenarios, imaginings). We tell ourselves, “I can’t do it. It’s too hard/too big. It will take too long….”
- Negative beliefs – We hold on to conscious and unconscious beliefs that dictate who we are, how we feel, and what we do (or don’t do). We tell ourselves, “I’m not smart enough/good enough/. Good things happen to others – not me”.
- Fear – fear of success/failure, pain and pleasure are the most dominant fears. We scare ourselves into despair and immobility. We make up stories to justify saying no to our dreams and desires.
- Procrastination leads to feeling guilty. We become disappointed and feel frustrated because we believe we have broken our agreement and promises to ourselves and others. That gives up permission to beat ourselves up. We punish ourselves and withhold the good stuff.
What do you tell yourself that makes it ok to say no to having what you want or need? When we continue to sabotage ourselves, it’s because we get something from it. There’s always a payoff.
What’s yours?
Wanna stop?
You can!
Anytime you say.
How about NOW?
Here are some keys to help your shift from NO to GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
1. Power of alignment – Inner conflict is felt when we are in discord with our heads and our heart. When your decisions, choices and actions line up with your spirit, core values, true desires and vision your life will have greater prosperity and happiness. Get to know yourself well. Make it a practice to listen to your heart, follow your instincts and trust yourself.
2. Deliberately choose to have better feelings and thoughts. Your imagined fears, negative self-talk, and beliefs about unworthiness serve you to recognize when you are in your drama and self-created stories by. Notice how you are feeling and what you are thinking. Your thoughts affect how you feel and what you do. When you can see what’s happening, you can choose to become the champion of your story or the victim of your circumstance. What you put your attention on expands.
3. Clarify what you really want . What inspires and excites you?
Identify a strong dream or desire.
Write down why you want it.
What will “having it” give you that you don’t have now?
Why do you want that?
What will having it……
Run this exercise to get to the heart of what you really want.
4. Decide to have it. Give yourself permission to receive what you want and desire. Commit to it. Refuse to take no for an answer.
5. Develop a positive/empowering mindset by challenging and replacing self-defeating attitudes and behaviors. Feel compassion and self- love by focusing on what’s right about you; what makes you special and unique.
6. Install accountability. Add people and systems to your team to help you stay motivated and inspired. Show up
7. Create a power strategy when you need a boost. Add things that motivate, inspire, nurture you – gratitude. When you give to yourself, the people in your life will get the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.
Remember to celebrate your successes along the way!
As you go through your day, I challenge you to let yourself have what you need and want to have the success and happiness you desire.
~ Say yes to following up with those business leads, calling prospects, attending networking events, taking 5 marketing actions today….
~ Say yes to booking that massage, taking a long weekend, scheduling lunch with a friend…
~ Say yes to registering for that class, learning one new skill, hiring a coach…
Say yes to having the abundance you want and the life you dream about. Need some help? Purchase any of my featured products to give you insights, tools and time to take charge of your life! It’s time to become the hero of your own life story. If not now, when?
Have a terrific day! 
Lorraine
www.powerfull-living.biz
Gamy Rachel on 26 Nov 2007 at 6:54 pm: 1
Hey there, Lorraine
Good post. Stumbled you and reviewed
http://mindthinksuccess.stumbleupon.com/
I like the way you ask -
“Wanna stop?”
I find myself asking this question too when my mind starts the drama
Blessings
Gamy
lorraine on 26 Nov 2007 at 8:39 pm: 2
Hey Gamy
Thanks for the Stumble!
The dramas we create can make us crazy. Amy how much clearer and intentional we become when we can step back, assess what’s really happening, decide what we want, and take the steps to have it. Life can be so much simpler and a lot happier!
Cheers,
Lorraine
Alex Blackwell on 26 Nov 2007 at 9:15 pm: 3
Wow - what a powerful post! Thanks so much for sharing this. You are right, like the Eagle’s song goes “sometimes we don’t even know we have the keys.” You have given us some awesome keys.
lorraine on 26 Nov 2007 at 10:15 pm: 4
I take that as a great compliment from you Alex!
Last week’s presentation really inspired me to look again at my own beliefs about “lettin myself have the good stuff!” It’s an ongoing exploration that just gets better and better the more I say YES!
Cheers
Lorraine
Lou Bortone on 26 Nov 2007 at 11:01 pm: 5
I agree… Excellent post… I’ve always thought it was ironic that we are our own worst enemies.
Lou B.
lorraine on 26 Nov 2007 at 11:08 pm: 6
The good news is that we can become our own best friends Lou.
Thanks for stopping by!
Timoteo on 27 Nov 2007 at 3:02 am: 7
Dear Lorraine
I am reaally on the way to enlightment and finding the real light.Not because of «me» but because I feel that you and others helpers around the world did not come to my life by«chance» but because God knows my real needs.I thought to say the «UNIVERSE» knows my real needs but it is really God who loves and wants the BEST for us.
Many blessings to you Lorraine.
diane on 27 Nov 2007 at 7:53 am: 8
Great words to start my day with. thanks for the powerfull message!
A Women’s Place » Short Stuff for Tuesday! on 27 Nov 2007 at 8:30 am: 9
[...] http://www.powerfull-living.biz/blog/2007/11/26/letting-yourself-have-outrageous-success-and-persona... [...]
Dora Zdanis on 27 Nov 2007 at 8:45 am: 10
Hello Lorraine,
Thank you so much for this message. I have been struggling with personal & business growth and I know it’s because I procrastinate. I instruct my team on the how tos and fail to follow my own good news. Thanks for the wake up call!
Judy Borow on 27 Nov 2007 at 10:54 am: 11
Hi Lorraine, Always great to hear your words of wisdom. They serve as reminders to keep me from slipping back to old habits that no longer serve me today. One thing I have learned to do is to decide ahead of time what I will do such as attend an event, go to the gym, or make an important business call and then do it regardless of how I happen to feel that day. If I planned it then I trust my decision more than my resistance to it in any given moment. Thanks again! Judy
lorraine on 27 Nov 2007 at 12:07 pm: 12
Having heard me deliver this in person I appreciate your stopping by a second time Diane.
Cheers,
Lorraine
lorraine on 27 Nov 2007 at 12:10 pm: 13
My pleasure Dora
It’s easy to get pulled into the daily dramas we create unless we stay conscious and intentional. For me it’s a daily wake up call.
Keep ringin that bell!
lorraine on 27 Nov 2007 at 12:13 pm: 14
Thanks so much Judy
I like what you said about trusting your decision to override any resistance. Sage advice that when we follow our heart, we can move mountains.
Cheers,
Lorraine
lorraine on 27 Nov 2007 at 12:25 pm: 15
It’s a pleasure to meet you Timoteo,
I appreciate your eCard and notes as well as stopping by to leave your comment. I too believe there are no coincidences and that God responds to our calls. I enjoy seeing all the different forms my prayers are answered in ways that are for my highest and best good,
Many blessings to YOU!
Lorraine
Claudia Juarez on 28 Nov 2007 at 7:22 am: 16
Great post Lorraine! Learning to stop sabotaging ourselves is the best thing we can do.
Would you give me permission to translate your post into Spanish for my readers?
lorraine on 28 Nov 2007 at 9:51 am: 17
Thanks so much for your comment Claudia
Once we stop sabotaging ourselves it’’s amazing how much more of what we want flows into our lives!
I’m flattered you wish to translate this article. Include my contact and copyright info and you have my permission. Thank you for asking!
Warmly,
Lorraine
Kathleen Gage on 28 Nov 2007 at 10:01 am: 18
Lorraine,
Excellent information. I especially like the insight into procrastination.
Often, we can get so far behind trying to just “get it all done” that we end up procrastinating. Something that has helped me immensely is to take time to get quiet, get centered, ask for guidance and then return to what I was doing.
It’s amazing how just taking a few minutes to get centered gets me out of procrastination that can be caused by overwhelm with what is in front of me.
Great information Lorraine. You ROCK!!
Kathleen Gage
The Street Smarts Marketer
lorraine on 28 Nov 2007 at 10:10 am: 19
What a great reminder to stop and go inside of ourselves Kathleen
I’m guilty of forgetting to do that sometimes when I get caught up in my dramas. Once I stop and take time to get centered and BREATHE, it’s amazing how fast things can quiet down so clarity can emerge.
Have a terrific day!
Lorraine
Carnival of Money, Growth and Happiness #24 | Credit Card Lowdown on 29 Nov 2007 at 12:29 pm: 20
[...] Cohen presents Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness posted at Powerfull Living. How often do you say no to the people and things that would increase [...]
Claudia Juarez on 29 Nov 2007 at 2:28 pm: 21
Of course I will leave both contact details and the trackback. I run 2 blogs, one in English and the other in Spanish. I’ll send you both links when they’re up.
Thanks a lot!
Claudia
lorraine on 29 Nov 2007 at 2:52 pm: 22
My pleasure Claudia
Thanks so much for asking!
Warmly,
Lorraine
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LIVE THE POWER UNLIMITED-volume 9…
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[...] This article was originally published in Lorraine Cohen’s blog [...]
CG Walters on 16 Dec 2007 at 6:12 pm: 31
An excellent bit of advice, Lorraine…many blessings,
CG
lorraine on 16 Dec 2007 at 7:16 pm: 32
Thanks CG
Many blessings to you too
Cheers,
Lorraine
E3 Success Blog » Blog Archive » E-3 Carnival of Success Principles - December 27, 2007 on 28 Dec 2007 at 12:39 pm: 33
[...] Cohen presents Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness posted at Powerfull Living, saying, “How often do you say no to the people and things that [...]
Liz on 30 Dec 2007 at 3:17 am: 34
Hi Lorraine
I found you at the E3 Success Carnival and I am impressed with the great message of this article. You’ve packed a lot of power into a single post. It’s encouraging to see how much of our success is within our own control - we just have to get clear on what we want and then move toward it. Thanks for the reminder at the right time!
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[...] resolution finds support at the E3 Carnival of Success Principles Lorraine Cohen presents Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness posted at Powerfull Living, saying, “How often do you say no to the people and things that would [...]
lorraine on 30 Dec 2007 at 8:25 am: 36
Thanks so much for the comments Liz,
I was very passionate when I wrote that post after delivering the presentation. Sometimes it’s just a matter of making a decision and refusing to allow any excuses or sabotage to get in the way.
Have a wonderfull day and an outrageously successfull and happy New Year!
Cheers
Lorraine
Powerfull Living » 20 Favorite Articles in 2007 on 31 Dec 2007 at 9:49 am: 37
[...] Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness [...]
Powerfull Living » Creating A Theme Year on 2 Jan 2008 at 10:49 am: 38
[...] I began looking at 2008 as another theme year. My theme for this year is FLOW (outrageous prosperity and happiness!) BTW - I wrote a great blog post you may not have read yet on Letting Yourself Have the Good Stuff. Go read it [...]
» Carnival of Business and Entrepreneurship #1 on 3 Jan 2008 at 9:05 pm: 39
[...] Cohen presents Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness posted at Powerfull Living. How often do you say no to the people and things that would increase [...]
Shanandore Brown on 4 Jan 2008 at 5:14 am: 40
I find when reading through this the mind is opened up to another space, another way of thinking. So thank you for creating a gateway to that space.
In regards to making decisions around outrageous prosperity and happiness, I find discernment the greatest theif of time (that is procrastinator). So I really love the Wanna Stop! actions. I have plenty of areas in my life where I can put them to good use. I’ll let you know how I go with practise.
lorraine on 4 Jan 2008 at 8:45 am: 41
Good morning Shanandore,
I have found that trusting yourself is key to discerning what is in alignment with your heart.
Knowing myself well (and what I really want),trusting my ability to make the best choices, having the courage to just “do it”, and surrounding myself with great people and critical elements to my success.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.
Warmly,
Lorraine
Powerfull Living » Using Treasure Mapping To Attract Your Vision on 4 Jan 2008 at 2:54 pm: 42
[...] In the creation of the treasure map I made a decision to receive the “good stuff”. I gave myself permission to say YES to my dreams and desires so that I could celebrate the accomplishment and receiving of what I want. (I wrote about letting yourself have outrageous success and personal happiness a few months ago. It was one of my most popular posts. Go read it) [...]
ask the Career Counselor — Helping you Navigate the Career Landscape on 7 Jan 2008 at 7:30 pm: 43
[...] I began looking at 2008 as another theme year. My themes for this year are Ease & Flow (of outrageous prosperity and happiness!) BTW - I wrote a great blog post you may not have read yet on Letting Yourself Have the Good Stuff. Go read it. [...]
Mary on 8 Jan 2008 at 12:51 am: 44
I love the post and all the great comments from posters.
I have five visions boards in my home. One for each area of live I want to receive. Historically I was challenged with envisioning what I wanted. With the boards I can focus and feel the “as if already”. I have gold stars on the items I have already received and am grateful for.
FYI: I just finished a wonderful book called, “Happy For No Reason” by Marci Shimoff. I love Marci’s quote, “”When you’re Happy for No Reason, you bring happiness to your outer experiences rather than trying to extract happiness from them…you live from happiness, rather than fo happiness”. Very Nice.
Thanks again for the great post. I will return.
Mary :>)
lorraine on 8 Jan 2008 at 2:00 pm: 45
WOW Mary
Five! Very impressive. Makes me think of the bagua map with feng shui. The boards are so empowering aren’t they?
Thanks so much for mentioning “Happy For No Reason.: I’ve added the nighttime practice of writing 1-2 full pages of everything I’m gratefull for since October of last year. I do this practice religiously. As a result, I have many more times of feeling happy for no reason which feels wonderfull.
Come back and visit. You can also subscribe!
Warmly,
Lorraine
Venture Files » Blog Archive » Carnival of Entrepreneurs #39: December 23, 2007 on 11 Mar 2008 at 11:58 am: 46
[...] Mike Buckley presents Pink eye posted at Mine Your Own Business. Lorraine Cohen presents Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness posted at Powerfull Living, saying, “How often do you say no to the people and things that [...]
Carnival of Entrepreneurs #39: December 23, 2007 on 11 Apr 2008 at 7:26 pm: 47
[...] Mike Buckley presents Pink eye posted at Mine Your Own Business. Lorraine Cohen presents Letting Yourself Have Outrageous Success and Personal Happiness posted at Powerfull Living, saying, “How often do you say no to the people and things that [...]
Sue Howkins on 8 Jun 2008 at 8:15 pm: 48
Thank you, this is the best site on vision boards that I have been able to find.
lorraine on 8 Jun 2008 at 9:08 pm: 49
I take that as a compliment Sue
Come back any time
Cheeers,
Lorraine